Staines' legendary figure perfectly captured the spirit of the late 90s and early 00s, and now he's making a comeback – but how does he fit into 2026? He addresses the criticism surrounding his return, his most difficult interviewee ever, and his plan to prevent world war two.

"Could you inform people that you're from Hustler?" Ali G asks me. "Or The Source. Or Guns & Ammo. Having a chat with a Guardian journalist doesn't exactly boost my street cred."

At Ali's insistence, we're gathering at a local fried chicken spot in Staines because – due to some misunderstanding – he assumed the single interview he'd agreed to for his upcoming movie was Chicken Shop Date, which had a "90% chance of leading to some action." He then launches into an entirely unprintable recollection of the initial encounter between him and "me Julie" in the accessible restroom of the Egham KFC.